CHOOSE YOU! Workshops

A New CHOOSE YOU! 4 Week Workshop is Coming!

2010-03-20T22:08:00.000-07:00

Love is in the air!

Can you feel it? Can you sense the onset of spring, the new beginnings, the opening up of life? I can feel it and, as we move into April, I'm creating a brand new CHOOSE YOU! course.

Up until now, CHOOSE YOU! has focused on just that: learning how to put yourself back on the priority list. For most of us, that's a pretty large order.

What's been coming to me lately is a strong sense that what people need, right now, is a CHOOSE YOU! course centered on breaking negative relationship patterns.

I've heard it said that life is a spiral. What lessons we don't learn the first time comes back again. Different people, different circumstances but always the same unlearned lessons we failed to learn the last time.

Have you ever found yourself in a relationship with someone, experiencing the same dramas, the same issues, the same patterns as you did the last three relationships and haven't you ever thought to yourself, "Oh, I've met you..." only to later say "Can I please not learn that lesson again?"

That's the real key: how can we learn what our negative relationship patterns are, where they come from and how to break them so we don't keep attracting the same kinds of people in different circumstances?

That's the course I'm creating and it'll debut in September 2010.

Stay tuned!

CHOOSE YOU! 2010 is HERE!

2009-09-01T16:32:00.000-07:00

We are exactly FOUR months from 2010. Can you believe it?????

Well, it's going to be a new year. Isn't it time for a new you?

Yes it is!

I've created a phenomenal NEW CHOOSE YOU! 6 month coaching program and it's like nothing I've ever done before.

Why?

Because it's six months of exclusive, unadulterated CHOOSE YOU! coaching using "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise L. Hay as the coaching program textbook. So many people own the book but don't really know what to do with it or they've read it 2 or 3 times and really don't see their affirmations coming to fruition.

It gets frustrating. "You Can Heal Your Life" is an amazing book and when you first read it, you think, "Yes, that's so true!" but then what?

CHOOSE YOU! 2010 answers that question for you.

IN this amazing 6 month coaching program, you'll receive:
1) Monthly private coaching sessions
2) A weekly online class
3) Worksheets, articles, workbooks, and a weekly homework assignment
4) Unlimited E-Coaching

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY
5) The support you need to push boundaries, uncover limiting beliefs, and become who you really are

If you've been waiting to transform your life, the wait is over!

Register for CHOOSE YOU! 2010 today!

If you register by September 30th, you get an Early Bird 30% OFF discount PLUS 4 extra private one hour coaching sessions (That's $180.00 OFF the original price!).

NOTE: The Early Bird Special only applies to those who prepay for the entire coaching program up front. There is a monthly payment plan at regular price for those who'd prefer to pay monthly. Please email chooseyouworkshop@gmail.com for details on the monthly payment plan.

Don't miss out! Class size is limited to 12 and CHOOSE YOU! 2010 will fill up fast.

Invest in you! Register today!

CHOOSE YOU! 2010
Dates: January 2, 2010 to July 1, 2010
Price: $600.00 ($420.00 if using the Early Bird Special)
How To Register: Click on the PayPal link to pay your $49.00 Non-refundable deposit fee (to hold your spot) OR if prepaying, click on the $469.00 PayPal link to pay both your registration fee and the coaching program fee for the Early Bird Special)

This amazing coaching program is offered on a first-come, first-serve basis. The first 12 to register will participate in the process.

Email Kassandra Vaughn at chooseyouworkshop@gmail.com with any questions.

CHOOSE YOU! Starts June 8th!

2009-04-16T14:37:00.000-07:00

Where do you fall on your priority list?

What does living your best life look like?

If you don't choose you, who will?

Are you ready to live life to the fullest?

Tired of wasting time thinking about the woulda/shoulda/couldas of the past?

Ready to let the past go and redesign your future based on what you want and need?

Are you ready to spend four weeks completely and totally on you?

Then it's time to CHOOSE YOU!

Space is limited! Register today by clicking on the Pay Pal link.

Stop waiting! Start becoming! CHOOSE YOU!

DATES: June 8th - July 6th
LOCATION: Online

EARLY BIRD REGISTRATION DEADLINE: April 30, 2009

EARLY BIRD PRICE: $199.00

REGISTRATION DEADLINE: May 30, 2009 (spaces fill up fast)

REGULAR REGISTRATION PRICE: $278.00

This amazing 4 week workshop includes:
* 3 private, one hour life coaching sessions (via telephone)
* one month of UNLIMITED e-coaching
* CHOOSE YOU! e book
* CHOOSE YOU! Workbook
* CHOOSE YOU! The Power of One MP3 Series

PLUS, IF YOU REGISTER EARLY (by Apr. 30th) THESE BONUSES!
* STAYING THE COURSE Audio Coaching Package
* You are NOT Your FICO Score E-book and workbook

Don't miss out! Space is limited. Register today!

Early Bird Registration Ends April 30, 2009!

Rebuild Your Life with CHOOSE YOU!

2009-02-23T18:26:00.000-08:00

CHOOSE YOU! offers a series of audio coaching programs and workshops designed to improve the quality of your life. In addition to the CHOOSE YOU! Platinum Coaching Program, we offer the following audio coaching series:

CHOOSE YOU! Not Divorce ($29.96)
Thinking about divorce? Don't make any clearcut decisions until you've worked with this phenomenal audio coaching series that will give you the insider's guide to making tough relationship decisions and recreating love in the process.

Lose It All & Get it Back ($39.95)
The ultimate coaching solution to every life shattering problem you will or have ever faced.

From Victim to Victor ($98.00)
Do you use words like 'should', 'but', 'don't know' and 'try'? Are you playing the victim or the victor in your life? Get rid of victimspeak and move into a position of personal power with this amazing audio coaching series.

The Ultimate CHOOSE YOU! Home Study Course ($149.00)
A comprehensive, transformational program designed to take your life from surviving to thriving in less than 30 days. Put you back on the priority list!

To order any of these amazing coaching programs, email Kassandra Vaughn at chooseyouworkshops@gmail.com.

Every Family Has a Higher Calling

2009-02-19T18:58:00.000-08:00

Every family has a higher calling, a purpose that has brought these individual souls together in this time for very specific (although relatively unknown) reasons.

Whether you live in a family you like or dislike, one of the best things you can do to improve the current situation is look for the higher calling.

While you may not know the whole reason you got a brother who's mean, a sister who lies or a father who's never around, what you do know is this:
1) Every person in your life is a teacher of your life; it's up to you to learn the lesson
2) Family members are human beings too; they're prone to error and your job is not to judge them but to forgive them and accept them for who they are, flaws and all.
3) Any grudges you carry are your burdens, not theirs; while you walk around mad, sad and depressed, the person who "inflicted" you is moving forward. That spells a lose-lose situation for you.
4) Expectations are the quickest way to start a family war. Who told you your sister would be there for you if you lost your house? Who said your mom had to watch your kids? Why is it your brother's job to take care of the house you rented to him knowing he never cleans any space he lives in? See, there's a lot of assumption and expectation that goes into dealing with family. If you'd begin to have no expectations, to give without expecting to get (which means giving ONLY when you have the room to give), you'd save yourself a whole world of hurt.

Remember: the only person you control is you.

5) Forgive does not mean you resume relationships as if nothing happened. Forgiveness is a choice and it's a good one but forgiving doesn't mean you go stupid and forget who you're dealing with. Forgiveness means you give up the right to judge or blame that person for their action and you move on by continuing to do what's right for you, even if that means not having that person be a constant, every day part of your life.

When you know all of this, you are able to look beyond petty circumstances and get to the heart of the matter:

How can we, as a family, lift each other up and,

in doing so, lift up the world?

Your answer might be as simple as:
"Accept each other for who we are."
"Love each other and support each other."
"Create a connection between all of our kids so they grow up with a stronger sense of family than we had."

Whatever the answer, you can only get to it if you leave blame, shame, and guilt behind. This you must do.

So, back to the question:

What is your family's higher calling?

What Your Same Sex Parent Doesn't Get, May Never Get, But You Need To

2009-02-17T16:49:00.000-08:00

In all relationships, there is no wound deeper than those inflicted between parent and child. That level is magnified in the same sex parent-child relationship.

When a mother belittles her daughter or a daughter rejects her mother, it isn't as simple as "I hate you." It goes much, much deeper.

The first role model a child ever has about being the man or woman he is capable of being comes from his or her father or mother. Do you remember the first time you saw your father shaving? Do you remember the first time you saw your mom put on lipstick or high heels? Remember the first time you tried to imitate them?

Even at that young age, you knew that who you would be was somehow intricately connected to who your mom or dad was. Trusting this, you put your faith in their identity and you lifted them up to God status because, to you, these were the only two people in the world who couldn't fail.

That notion remains completely in tact until your first memory of abuse. Whether physical, mental or spiritual, children know how they are supposed to be treated and when the exact opposite happens, they know two things:
1) It's not right
2) It's somehow their fault because they're God-like parents couldn't be wrong

As the small child longing for your parents' love and approval, entering the world assuming you had it, it's a volcano of an experience to turn to the one person you're supposed to be safest with and hear "Shut up!" or "You're stupid!" or "I wish you were never born!" or "You don't do anything right!"

It's unthinkable to be beaten for not taking out the trash on time or talking back or forgetting to say thank you. By doing this, your parents weren't just beating you up; they were beating you down, sending home the message that who you are is not enough, without punishment, and never will be.

It's a crushing experience when "God" hates you and, before long, you begin to hate yourself.

You begin to inflict the emotional abuse on yourself because you'd rather beat your parents to the punch than give them the satisfaction of seeing you cry. The abused becomes the abuser and the cycle continues.

With the same sex parent, the guilt is magnified. You either become the son your father always wanted or the one who'll never be half the man he is. You either take on your mother's baggage or live forever trying not to be crushed by it.

Whatever the family history, whatever the family secrets, father/son and mother/daughter dynamics can be explosive.

Why?

Because when you were born, that parent put into you all the hopes and dreams he/she never had the opportunity to pursue. By the time you hit the teen years, this same parent is looking upon you with all the loss and regret he or she has had to live with since you were born.

In some way, shape, and form, to them, you've grown up to be either their:
1) tropy
2) lost cause

Neither choice leaves you the room to be you.

So what do you do?

I'm not going to tell you to have a heart-to-heart talk. If you're reading this article, it means you've probably had a number of those "We need to work on our relationship" talks only to hear "Ok but you're wrong and I'm right."

You can't have a productive, transforming conversation with someone who strongly feels that they don't need any changing.

There! I said it!

What you do need to do is resolve this issue within yourself so you can be free to love, forgive and experience joy in all of your other relationships. This doesn't require closure with your same sex parent (although it would be nice). It requires you giving that small inner child the one thing he/she never got growing up- love and acceptance.

First, you need to let the bitterness, lack of trust, and anger for your parent go. He/she did the best they could with what they knew how.

A screwed up grandparent who raises a screwed up parent who raises you does not spell for a happy family. Acknowledge that your parents' inner child is in as much pain as yours and let it go at that.

I'm not saying forget. We teach people how to treat us. You must remember so when you deal with your parents, you know how to set up boundaries. I'm saying let the past go, forgive it and stop blaming them because it's hurting you way more than it's hurting them. Forgiveness is your lifesaver, not their alibi.

The second thing you need to do is reconnect with your inner child. In psychology, they call it inner child work. You'll find many exercises and ways to do this in Self Parenting: The Complete Guide to Your Inner Conversations by John Pollard III and The Power Is Within You by Louise L. Hay. Buy these books, do the work and heal yourself.

Last but not least, make a commitment that the cycle ends here. You will not do to your children what your parents did to you. Unlike your parents, you do know better. You have the tools. Now it's up to you to do the work and live the life that your parents barely dreamed of.

Create a world where your kids will grow up knowing that they are safe, they are loved and, no matter what, they are enough.

That's how the world will change... and it begins with you!

"In order to have the space to be ourselves, we need to give that space to others. By forcing our parents to be something that they are not, we cut off our own love. We judge our parents just the way that they judge us. If we want to share with our parents, we need to begin by eradicating our own preconceived judgments of them."
- Louise L. Hay, "The Power is Within You"

P.S. Have a controlling parent in your life? Sign up for the FREE e-newsletter and get a copy of "Control Freak: Everybody Has One" available exclusively to e-newsletter subscribers.

The Curse of Tolerance In Families

2009-02-15T19:48:00.001-08:00

"This is what I'm doing."
"I think it's stupid and you're going to regret it."
"Maybe so but it's my life."
"Fine. Do what you want. I may tolerate this endeavor of yours but I'm definitely not supporting it."

Ever have that conversation?

Whether you're on the receiving or giving end, it doesn't feel good. We all like approval and when the people closest to you refuse to give it, or worse, give you just the opposite, it can be extremely painful to take.

So what tends to happen in this situation?

Someone retreats and isolates from the family... thus the curse of 'tolerance.'

If what you want is a peace-filled, joyous home, the word tolerance has no place in it. By definition, the word tolerance means "a sympathy or indulgence for beliefs or practices differing from or conflicting with one's own."

No judgment there, right?

In The Power of Intention , Dr. Wayne Dyer writes, "Think of impacting others like gravity, with no need to move against or attack anyone. People who feel empowered by your presence become kindred spirits. That can only happen if they feel safe rather than attacked, secure rather than judged, calm rather than harassed."

When you "tolerate" the choices being made by a family member what you are really saying is, "I'm right, you're wrong and your justification for doing this proves to me that your thinking and way of doing things isn't good enough."

You are telling that person that they aren't good enough. Your two cents as to how they should run their lives has now become a judgment that results in pushing them farther away from you for a time, maybe forever.

How's that for family togetherness?

You might ask, "But what if this person is making a terrible mistake? What if every fiber of my being is against their choice? Am I supposed to smile and pretend that they're doing the right thing, especially if it's illegal (drugs, drinking, sex, etc.)?"

My answer to you is this:
Your role, in any family dynamic, is not to "show" that person the way but to encourage and empower them as they find it for themsleves. That might mean this person is going to have to go through some rough times to get the lesson.

It may mean that, for a time, you commit to saying nothing rather than speaking out in judgment. It might mean that you ask this person lovingly not to discuss this particular issue with you because YOU are not ready to receive it.

Either way, it boils down to a choice. Do you choose to be the supportive family member who says, "I support you in figuring out what's right for you and I know, whatever comes, you'll handle it" or do you choose to be the domineering, highly judgmental family member who says "What you're doing is wrong and I won't stand by and watch you make a fool of yourself."

At the end of the day, whatever choice you make, has everything to do with YOU and NOTHING to do with that family member or his or her choice?

Why?

Don Miguel Ruiz, in The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom, A Toltec Wisdom Book , explains it best:

"Whatever you think, whatever you feel, I know is your problem and not my problem. It is the way you see the world. It is nothing personal, because you are dealing with yourself, not with me. Others are going to have their own opinion according to their belief system, so nothing they think about me is really about me, but it is about them."

Knowing this helps both people in the situation. If you've been the one receiving all the judgment and you continue to experience it with that family member, keep in mind two things:
1) If you're getting judgment from ANYBODY else, that means that somewhere within you, you're judging yourself. Dig deep, find out where, and start accepting yourself just the way you are.
2) If you take what that person says and make an agreement for that to be your truth, what you're really letting saying to them is "What you think of me is more important than what I think of myself." We teach people how to treat us.

Either way, as the person on the receiving end, you have two choices:
1) Don't share your vision with people who can't see (i.e. don't talk about it so you don't end up wasting energy defending it)
2) Don't take it personally; whatever negativity that person is dishing out to you is about them, not you. Don't take it personally.

Final Point:
Maya Angelou once said, "When someone shows you who they are, believe them."

Before you go into any heated family discussion, ask yourself two questions:
1) Am I entering this conversation with love or fear?
2) Is what I'm about to say a reflection of who I really am?

Being honest with yourself and asking (and answering these questions) before having the talk will make the outcome 100 times better.

*NOTE: If you're walking into the conversation mad as hell, turn around and walk out. This is not the time or energy space for you to be having this conversation. I'm just sayin!

Check back here for the next post, "Control Freak: Everybody Has One."

Kassandra Vaughn, CEO ROI Coaching
Think big, act small, love all the way through...

2009-02-14T18:51:00.000-08:00

Name the Top 3 Things You Want In Your Life
…. Then use your computer for 10 minutes a day
to strategically manifest the things you want in your life.

Pull out a sheet of paper and write the top 3 things you wish to have, long to improve, or change in your life right now. Examples: career (your ideal job), money (list a specific amount), a loving relationship (or the saving of a marriage), your health (weight, diet, stress levels), your dream home, a new car, etc.

Okay, have you written the 3 things you want?

What if I told you that there’s a definite way you can achieve those 3 things- and anything else you choose- by using the power of your computer for just 10 minutes a day for the next 30 days?

In the next two minutes, I will show you an incredible program that enables you to manifest everything you desire through the transformative power of three words…

This information is not available anywhere else on the Web, or the world, for that matter. So I urge you to read every word of this article because the secret that can single-handedly transform your life is hidden in this website- and I don’t want you to miss it.

In the past five years, the term “Law of Attraction” has become extremely popular but did you know that the concept itself has been in existence since 1906? In fact, in 1910, a man by the name of Wallace D. Wattles wrote a highly controversial book exposing the secrets of leading a wealthy, abundant life. In it, he laid out the exact steps ANY person could take to become rich with 100% surety.

Nearly 100 years later, authors, speakers and coaches of all shapes and sizes claim to know the “secret” to manifesting an abundant, happy life…

So why is the “secret” not working for you?

The secret says “Think about it, affirm it, and it’s yours.” The truth is that manifesting requires work. It also requires doing things in a certain way. None of that can be done until you’ve dealt with the inner programming deep within you that screams “Liar!” every time you set a personal goal for yourself.

The truth is until you truly believe that you deserve the best,

no affirmation in the world is going to be effective in helping you get it.

The CHOOSE YOU! Program goes to the root of your limiting beliefs, helps you conquer the fear of living life full throttle, and gives you the specific tools you need to overcome self-doubt. More than that, our program fills in all the blanks of manifestation by giving you the only system that will teach you, guide you and break down the process in doable steps in just 10 minutes a day.

With our process, the only option you have is to manifest your dreams. When followed to the letter, there is no other option.

So what is the CHOOSE YOU! 4 Week Program?

The best combination of life coaching, online learning, affirmations and visualization available ANYWHERE! You get everything you need to change your mind, take charge of your life, and all it takes is 30 days.

What will this cost me?

No where near the price you’re paying by living life under the radar screen. No where near the amount you’re spending in worry, stress, and fear. No where near the amount you’ll spend over a life time if something doesn’t change RIGHT NOW.

I don’t know about you but I’d pay whatever it took to get my life back. Will you?

The CHOOSE YOU! 4 Week Program is the surefire way to manifest your dreams; all that’s left is for you to do what it takes to succeed. In order to do that, you need to get leverage on yourself.

Quite frankly, the CHOOSE YOU! 4 Week program cannot fail when it is implemented exactly as prescribed. But no empowerment program, no matter how powerful, will work if there isn’t the power of commitment behind it.

Are you ready to change your life?

Pull out a new sheet of paper, write your name, the top 3 things you desire in your life, and the reasons why you need to change your life in the form of the commitment statement listed below. Read the completed statement out loud to reinforce the commitment that will lead to your ultimate success.

I, __________________________, have decided I intend to manifest _______________________________, _________________________________, and _____________________________ in my life because ______________________________________ and I’m committed to following the CHOOSE YOU! Program until I manifest all three desires.

Don’t waste another second!

Register for this amazing 30 day program that will change your entire life by putting you back on the priority list and in the driver’s seat of your life.

*NOTE: Space is limited. Click the PayPal link to register.

P.S. You might still be wondering, “What are those 3 words?”

Sign up for CHOOSE YOU! and find out!

Can You Receive as Good as You Give?

2009-02-13T18:38:00.001-08:00

"We cannot truly receive someone until we have learned, with grace and gratitude, to receive his or her many gifts to us. The lover's smile is a gift. The lover's thoughts are a gift. The lover's work is a gift. The lover's advice is a gift."
- Marianne Williamson, Enchanted Love

What is your capacity to receive love? We spend alot of time talking about giving love, about being there for others, about "selflessness" but all of that talk is irrelevant if you lack an equal capacity to receive love.

Receiving love means taking in a compliment, really taking it in and basking in that, not deflecting from yourself to the other person before they've even had a chance to finish complimenting you.

Receiving love means allowing others to provide for you without feeling anxiety or stress as to how you're going to pay them back. Receiving love means being willing to ask for what you want, knowing that you deserve it, and being completely unattached to whether that person says yes or no. It means loving yourself enough to always ask, regardless of the answer.

Receiving love is as important as giving it because what you withhold from yourself, you will always withhold, in some way, shape , or form, from someone else.

Remember that the next time someone pays you a compliment, offers help, or goes out of their way to show you love.

"If you are a woman, you might take a solid, still moment to breathe in the sweetness of a compliment that a man just gave you. He will feel you doing that. It feeds him to know that he just fed you."
- Marianne Williamson, Enchanted Love

I can't say enough about Marianne Williamson's Enchanted Love: The Mystical Power Of Intimate Relationships
. It has revolutionized the way I look at all relationships and it has transformed the way my clients participate in all of their relationships. If you don't have it, please get it today!

2009-02-10T06:23:00.000-08:00

Need help creating a new story?

I will be teaching a FREE LIVE! 5 week workshop in North Hollywood, CA called "Rewriting Your Life Story". Bring a journal, a pen, and your life story and we'll work through the process of recreating it. Info on the course and registration is below:

DAY: Wednesdays
TIME: 8-10 PM PST
START DATE: Wednesday, April 8, 2009
END DATE: Wednesday, May 6, 2009
COST: FREE!
HOW TO REGISTER: Email your interest to chooseyouworkshops@gmail.com
PLEASE NOTE: Class size is limited to 15. Spaces will fill up fast!